Fair Fighting Rules Worksheet

GinaMarie Guarino, LMHC GinaMarie Guarino, LMHC

Worksheet updated on January 23rd, 2025

Fair Fighting Rules Worksheet

Arguments are never easy, but learning ways to have constructive arguments can help promote healthy conflict resolution in a relationship. When couples struggle to find a resolution during arguments, their ability to safely communicate and express their feelings is interrupted.

Creating a safe space to argue takes practice, but couples can learn how to find a resolution. Learning to argue safely prevents emotions from escalating and promotes respectful communication between partners.

About This Worksheet

Fighting is never fun, but when couples learn how to resolve conflict during an argument, they can manage their emotions, show up for their partner, and express themselves healthily. The Fair Fighting Rules worksheet outlines rules to follow when arguing with a partner or loved one. These rules promote healthy and respectful habits when arguing in a relationship.

The Fair Fighting Rules worksheet helps set expectations during arguments that prevent issues from escalating. Couples learn how to fight fairly and argue without causing harm to their partner or the relationship. This worksheet is used with adults in couples counseling settings.

Instructions

A list of 15 fair fighting rules is provided on the Fair Fighting Rules worksheet. Review the list with the couple and explain that it aids in ensuring that arguments remain safe, respectful, and constructive when working toward resolution.

After reviewing the 15 fair fighting rules, instruct the couple to create a list of up to 10 rules for their relationship. You may provide prompts for creating their fair fighting rules, like:

  • “What are some escalating comments or topics you don’t want to be mentioned during arguments?”
  • “What can be implemented to promote a safe space during arguments?”
  • “What patterns do you need to modify or eliminate to promote healthy communication?”

When the couple has finished, review their rules with them. Provide each partner with a copy of the list for reference.

Download Fair Fighting Rules Worksheet

Link To This Worksheet

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